Never I have actually share with you guys about my love life in the blog. Perhaps it was this time I'm thinking of something to write, so I write.. The first time I date someone, it was wonderful. Only due to the fact that we have the long distance relationship, communication plays an important role, of which I failed to adhere to it, and eventually I talked about this matter to her that it's better we remain as friend as I love her too much that I don't want to hurt her feeling anymore with my attitude. That was few years ago.
Another girl that I used to like in the church, once sent me a sms and kinda hinted me that she's interested in me as well. However, that time I didn't catch the point. Few months later, found out that she's attach with someone. Well, I have to bygone with those matter and move on with my life and that time found my first love, of which didn't last long due to communication, just like what I had previously mentioned.
By the time we both changed our status as friends, the other one also got broke up with her bf. We both then just keep in touch as friend, then later come into the part where feelings slowly get into it. That time was also my first time to have my mum to make reservation for me at the restaurant so that I could bring her for buffet dinner and enjoying ourselves with live band music (and too bad, it kinda sucks though).
Throughout the dating-ship, we both didn't dare to hold hands. Probably that time we both trying to hint each other to start their first move to hold their hand first. Haha..pity, I was seriously scared to first started the move. Well, we finally did when we had our night walk at the 'late nite market' before Chinese New Year and we've been roaming around within the crowds. However, that month was also my final month before I had to move on another place as I got the job offer at KL. I did asked her if she wanted to move over with me, however she told me that she wanted to stay on in KK. Come into this part, it make me think back again about my previous relationship, whereby my first relationship failed are due to the long distance relationship that causes us lack of communication. So, in the end, I was the one to called it off becoz I just don't want the DeJavu happen again.
After for a year later, found another girl, of which we got to know each in friendster. We had so much in common, and the bad point part is she's not Malaysian, and she's in somewhere out there. That time I truely let out my love for her and thought that we both could work things together despite that we live far apart. Came over to her country for the first time and spend time as much as I could have as I can tell for myself that I truely love her, and I know that she love me too, cos I can sense that. She brought me few places as my time there is quite limited, due to my sickness that I had a week prior to my vacation with her.
Just weeks after my vacation, things started to get change and I don't know what's gone into her mind. Didn't reply my sms, didn't pick up my call. Didn't even reply my e-mail. This is really strange. Something is not right. I have tried to talk over with her about this matter however, nothing seems to bother her. One of the weekend, she sent in an sms and told me to 'Stop disturb her peaceful mind, as she had enough stress and if I still continue to do that, she will reconsider our relationship.'
That time, my heart broke in multi-tiny pieces. I was working that time and I quickly went into the washroom and let it out. It really hurt me. Ex-colleagues of mine called me up that told me to stand strong and just move on with my own life since she don't appreciate my love towards her. It took me quite sometime to get use to it. My other friends also told me that they find it very impossible that this could happen on me, and suspect that she might do something behind my back that I may not aware of and they asked me to try check it out by myself. So in the end, I tried it out, and it's really true. By using this method, I finally saw the true colors of that girl. After for so long that we've been together, that is how she treat me. That time, I laughed myself for being a fool to shed the tears for someone who don't appreciate the greatest treasure in a human being.
From then, I make myself clear that not to fall in love with someone who don't appreciate my love, and of course I set my own criteria (When comes to love, all criteria are gone). My criteria is simple and yet make sense. For the first few weeks it will be the time of getting to know her better and better and better until to the stage that I know her too well and still manage to go through with her, good and bad times and still standing firm, she will be the one for me.
During my recent birthday, friends were wishing me many happy returns, prosperous years, blah blah blah..and my brother wished me to get myself a life partner asap. Even my mum kinda hinted me indirectly that I should get myself a girlfriend so that the girl could take care of me while I'm away from home and I could do the same for the girl. Haha..If it was that easy to get myself one, I would have already date one right now. (Kinda felt that probably my mum really wanted a grandchild from us, and me and my brother are still single. For me, it just the matter of love luck which is still not there. Perhaps not a right time?)
Well, in between met few girls in my life and of course some of them don't appreciate of who I am, and most of my friends were wondering..How come no one appreciate a nice cute looking guy. To my understanding, I don't know what's wrong with them, but I can guess that I am not what they are looking for. To my friends, that's what they call, LIFE. To me...it was just nothing.
Believe me, sometimes it's not just about the look, not about your education, not about your work background. The most important of all is what is deep down inside the heart and her personality.
Few days ago I told this things to my friends, told them that I would rather pour my love on music and pets rather than loving somebody, cos music don't hurt you, music don't kick your butt. Music goes along with the flow and it's up to me how beautiful I composed the music. Same goes with the pet. I plan to get myself a dog (and now still in dilemma on which dog to buy, Siberian Husky perhaps). They kinda speechless though, but they do told me that Aaron's life could be complete if there's someone out there would be my 'future wife'. I just kept finger cross.
Anyway, it's been years, we all been through the hard time and good times as well. One who is now based in Sabah, working in a place, earn good money and have puppies with her, of whom I still kept in touch with her once in a while and yet quite close, another one who is now got transferred to KL for her new 'single' life and only to find out that just months after that I got to know that she's going to get marry with a guy of whom I don't know of. The last one, I didn't bother.
I guess sometimes life as a single guy is good. So much of freedom. Can do whatever you want and don't have to think too much on love stuffs. For now, after God, career and music are the most important thing to me.
